![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
johnstonmrI'm tired of defending my geekiness.
Yes, I'm a geek. That's not an admission, it's a statement. I'm sick of people acting like my love of Science Fiction and Fantasy, and more, my love of the associated Fandom, is something to be ashamed of. To those who continually make fun of me for it, I say these things:
1) Fuck you! What the hell is wrong with you that you have to belittle me for something I enjoy? You don't like it? Great! Go away and leave those of us who do in peace. Think it's weird? Fine! Do you absolutely have to say so to me?
2) When you make fun of those who are in sci-fi clubs (and believe me, I know some of them are kinda out there), keep in mind that some of the people you're making fun of -- even those who are Out There -- are my friends. And I'm tired of pretending they're not so I don't get made fun of. I'm a member (well, not in good standing, I haven't paid this year's dues, but still!) of the U.S.S. Defiance fan club. Sure, it's a silly name. Sure, there are some people there I wish would get lives outside SF/F. But these are also, with a few exceptions, good, hardworking people with lives, emotions, and interests other than Science Fiction. Even the more annoyingly stuck-in-fiction members of Defiance have non-genre interests -- from ham radio to politics to literature.
Those people helped me through some very difficult years at one time, and I owe them a debt I can never repay -- even the ones I don't speak to much anymore mean something to me. And damn you to hell for making me feel bad about it. And damn ME to hell for letting you.
No one has to like all of someone else's friends. Some of my friends don't like another of them. I can count the number of people from Gregory and Elli's dojo I like on one hand -- and one of the people they like the most pisses me off so much I can't be in the room with him for very long. So what? Not their problem -- it's mine, and I don't burden them with it (In fact, this is likely the first inkling they have of it, unless they're much more perceptive than I thought).
Yes, some of the people in those groups are so completely divorced from reality they make even my skin crawl. But don't assume that ALL of the members are like that. In my ten years in fandom, I've met a lot of smart, attractive, successful people in those clubs -- just as many as the losers, in fact.
Sure, I mostly sit in the back with Sally, Penny, Sheryl, Lisa, and Tracy and heckle the crap out of the people who take it all too seriously. But I'm still one of them in the end, and I know it.
I'm one of them. End of story.
Yes, I'm a geek. That's not an admission, it's a statement. I'm sick of people acting like my love of Science Fiction and Fantasy, and more, my love of the associated Fandom, is something to be ashamed of. To those who continually make fun of me for it, I say these things:
1) Fuck you! What the hell is wrong with you that you have to belittle me for something I enjoy? You don't like it? Great! Go away and leave those of us who do in peace. Think it's weird? Fine! Do you absolutely have to say so to me?
2) When you make fun of those who are in sci-fi clubs (and believe me, I know some of them are kinda out there), keep in mind that some of the people you're making fun of -- even those who are Out There -- are my friends. And I'm tired of pretending they're not so I don't get made fun of. I'm a member (well, not in good standing, I haven't paid this year's dues, but still!) of the U.S.S. Defiance fan club. Sure, it's a silly name. Sure, there are some people there I wish would get lives outside SF/F. But these are also, with a few exceptions, good, hardworking people with lives, emotions, and interests other than Science Fiction. Even the more annoyingly stuck-in-fiction members of Defiance have non-genre interests -- from ham radio to politics to literature.
Those people helped me through some very difficult years at one time, and I owe them a debt I can never repay -- even the ones I don't speak to much anymore mean something to me. And damn you to hell for making me feel bad about it. And damn ME to hell for letting you.
No one has to like all of someone else's friends. Some of my friends don't like another of them. I can count the number of people from Gregory and Elli's dojo I like on one hand -- and one of the people they like the most pisses me off so much I can't be in the room with him for very long. So what? Not their problem -- it's mine, and I don't burden them with it (In fact, this is likely the first inkling they have of it, unless they're much more perceptive than I thought).
Yes, some of the people in those groups are so completely divorced from reality they make even my skin crawl. But don't assume that ALL of the members are like that. In my ten years in fandom, I've met a lot of smart, attractive, successful people in those clubs -- just as many as the losers, in fact.
Sure, I mostly sit in the back with Sally, Penny, Sheryl, Lisa, and Tracy and heckle the crap out of the people who take it all too seriously. But I'm still one of them in the end, and I know it.
I'm one of them. End of story.
Tags:
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
Re: opinion
Now, not everyone in that group does that as much as others.. Some of the more advanced students there seem to get the idea that I'm never going to join and somehow turn off the preaching. But then they seem to allways be looking down to me. They have a sort of "I know something you don't and you could never understand it" approach to me. Hell, I've flat-out been told that it's something I couldn't understand.
Which, granted, I don't mind one bit. If understanding it makes people act like that and shut out anyone not a part of the "in" crowd, I hope I never understand it. May my mind be ever confuzed (not a far step from my current state).
But the fact remains, and the point I'm trying to get to, is that I have also felt the "you're not one of us", "we don't need or want you here" vibe from that group on many occasions.
I'm not expecting to be invited on the mat for a workout with the group the instant I walk in the door (I think my group is the only one that does that) but I would at least like to have my presence aknowledged after sitting by the mat for a bit. Maybe have an advanced student or the Sensi come over and explain what is going on. Or am I just expecting too much from any dojo in general?
wow, that was long-winded.. apologies to anyone who actually read all that trash.