![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
May. 11th, 2010 09:22 am
State of the Michael
I was going to title this "State of the Mahdi," but I'm increasingly uncomfortable with that name. Mahdi means "messiah" in Arabic, and I'm nothing of the sort. I originally chose the name for its Dune link, because the other ridiculously pretentious and geeky Dune references were taken. I'm at a loss what to change it to, however. Suggestions welcomed, but for once keep them serious? I know it's a vain hope.
Work
Anyway, I'm more and more stressed right now. Tomorrow I have to attend a training I have no desire to attend, because it's Waldorf-methods. I'm not going to be here next year, so it seems like a waste of time. However, I need the professional development hours or my pay will be docked and I'll lose a year of full service for my retirement account. So, I go, and make the best of it.
I think that even if I hadn't been surplused, I'd have to have left this place. More and more, I'm seeing the hypocrisy behind the scenes. They claim to be a better kind of school, but the same bullshit goes on. One of the most Waldorf-nutty teachers is a dick, not only to his students but to any teacher who disagrees with the party line. His borderline-hostility to me has been replaced with open disregard; it's like I no longer exist except for a polite "hello." I'm 99% certain he's the driving force behind my being voted off the island.
I just don't think this method of instruction works in a public school environment, and the mental gymnastics they indulge in astound me. "Waldorf-educated kids don't do well on standardized tests, but they learn how to think" is a standard boast. I'm sorry, but that's bullshit. My Waldorf-educated students are great at copying, but not so great at original thought. If one knows how to think, one can do quite well on standardized tests. I come from the era before drill-and-kill "teach to the test" nonsense, and I always did well--because I knew how to think to get the answers. Mind you, I'm not in favor of those kinds of tests in general, though they have their place.
My students are done. Getting them to work is currently harder than flying by flapping your arms. I'm growing increasingly irritated by their antics, and I want this year to be over as much as they do. Then I can get started on preparing for my new assignment. I really hope I end up at a high school; I'd hate to throw four years of lesson- and curriculum-development out the window and have to start over for the middle grades.
If the surplus process lands me in a middle school, I'll probably start preparing for it, but also applying for traditional openings at high schools. Currently my wish list of assignment goes like this:
C.K. McClatchy High School - Fat Chance. I'm pretty sure the positions opened there will be filled by the time I get a shot at the list. But it's a dream.
John F. Kennedy High School - A great place. I know the office manager there and adore her, and I know a couple of teachers there. But that won't help me, since it's all based primarily on seniority. *shrug*
West Campus - A "small" high school (but 900 students, so bigger than where I've taught before), exclusively 3.0 students and above. In some ways a dream, in others a nightmare--hence why it's number 3 on my list.
Rosemont High School - Not the best idea; it's as much of a drive as my current assignment, but it's a comprehensive school and I've taught in their format (4x4 blocks: 4 classes per day, 90 minutes each), and can do it.
After that, it's either Hiram Johnson or Luther Burbank; both have their good and bad traits. Then it's middle schools, bleah.
Home
Home is ... home. Still happily married, still happy to be a dad. Still needing more time alone than I tend to get. Still not sleeping well. I know that it's incorrect, but I feel as though I haven't had a good night's sleep in 3 years. The other night Tegan went to sleep at 7:30 (which she's done before, and slept through the night), woke at 11:30, and stayed awake until 4:00am, when she finally went to sleep. Due to factors I won't go into here, I dealt with it largely by myself, then slept about four hours. The next day I slept for nearly 12 hours, but I still feel as though I haven't recovered. And I feel like I had no weekend. But then, that's life, yeah?
We're getting increasingly worried about money. We can survive for quite some time as is, but it's annoying to be so cash-poor. We can afford our mortgage and bills, but then we have barely anything left, which means we're always a bit worried.
Fatherhood
I continue to cherish the relationship I have with my daughter, but she's going through a period of ornery pushing dad away, and that hurts even though I know it's BS and she'll be crawling into my lap and giggling at me twenty minutes later.
Work
Anyway, I'm more and more stressed right now. Tomorrow I have to attend a training I have no desire to attend, because it's Waldorf-methods. I'm not going to be here next year, so it seems like a waste of time. However, I need the professional development hours or my pay will be docked and I'll lose a year of full service for my retirement account. So, I go, and make the best of it.
I think that even if I hadn't been surplused, I'd have to have left this place. More and more, I'm seeing the hypocrisy behind the scenes. They claim to be a better kind of school, but the same bullshit goes on. One of the most Waldorf-nutty teachers is a dick, not only to his students but to any teacher who disagrees with the party line. His borderline-hostility to me has been replaced with open disregard; it's like I no longer exist except for a polite "hello." I'm 99% certain he's the driving force behind my being voted off the island.
I just don't think this method of instruction works in a public school environment, and the mental gymnastics they indulge in astound me. "Waldorf-educated kids don't do well on standardized tests, but they learn how to think" is a standard boast. I'm sorry, but that's bullshit. My Waldorf-educated students are great at copying, but not so great at original thought. If one knows how to think, one can do quite well on standardized tests. I come from the era before drill-and-kill "teach to the test" nonsense, and I always did well--because I knew how to think to get the answers. Mind you, I'm not in favor of those kinds of tests in general, though they have their place.
My students are done. Getting them to work is currently harder than flying by flapping your arms. I'm growing increasingly irritated by their antics, and I want this year to be over as much as they do. Then I can get started on preparing for my new assignment. I really hope I end up at a high school; I'd hate to throw four years of lesson- and curriculum-development out the window and have to start over for the middle grades.
If the surplus process lands me in a middle school, I'll probably start preparing for it, but also applying for traditional openings at high schools. Currently my wish list of assignment goes like this:
C.K. McClatchy High School - Fat Chance. I'm pretty sure the positions opened there will be filled by the time I get a shot at the list. But it's a dream.
John F. Kennedy High School - A great place. I know the office manager there and adore her, and I know a couple of teachers there. But that won't help me, since it's all based primarily on seniority. *shrug*
West Campus - A "small" high school (but 900 students, so bigger than where I've taught before), exclusively 3.0 students and above. In some ways a dream, in others a nightmare--hence why it's number 3 on my list.
Rosemont High School - Not the best idea; it's as much of a drive as my current assignment, but it's a comprehensive school and I've taught in their format (4x4 blocks: 4 classes per day, 90 minutes each), and can do it.
After that, it's either Hiram Johnson or Luther Burbank; both have their good and bad traits. Then it's middle schools, bleah.
Home
Home is ... home. Still happily married, still happy to be a dad. Still needing more time alone than I tend to get. Still not sleeping well. I know that it's incorrect, but I feel as though I haven't had a good night's sleep in 3 years. The other night Tegan went to sleep at 7:30 (which she's done before, and slept through the night), woke at 11:30, and stayed awake until 4:00am, when she finally went to sleep. Due to factors I won't go into here, I dealt with it largely by myself, then slept about four hours. The next day I slept for nearly 12 hours, but I still feel as though I haven't recovered. And I feel like I had no weekend. But then, that's life, yeah?
We're getting increasingly worried about money. We can survive for quite some time as is, but it's annoying to be so cash-poor. We can afford our mortgage and bills, but then we have barely anything left, which means we're always a bit worried.
Fatherhood
I continue to cherish the relationship I have with my daughter, but she's going through a period of ornery pushing dad away, and that hurts even though I know it's BS and she'll be crawling into my lap and giggling at me twenty minutes later.