Olympics stuff

First, behind this link is an article about what happens when you get lots of athletic hotties holed up together for two weeks, with stories from past Olympians about the shenanigans our athletes get up to when their coaches aren't looking. ktbee, I'll bet there's a slash archive somewhere about this stuff. ;P

Second... a question. Why is it, do you think, that female gymnasts look like pre-pubescent tweens without, on average, a lot of feminine sex appeal, but male gymnasts look like paragons of masculine hotness?

Third... how, exactly, is Venus Williams an amateur? How is it that Pros are allowed into the Olympics? Did I miss something?

Fourth... why can't I hire Yang Wei, Jonathon Horton, and Alexander Artemov to help me move? And clean my house? And basically just stand around and be stared at?

Fifth, and unrelated... getting older sucks. I'm actually starting to see the effects of age beyond gray hair; I don't like most of them. Note that I'm not saying "Oh, I'm old!" as that's utterly stupid. But I don't like the changes age brings. And it's not like I've been in good shape since I was 25, anyway. Now I have to work even harder to get back there than I did then.