![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
Dec. 1st, 2004 02:04 pm
Reccomendation to people in general
If you know me -- as in, you've actually spent large amounts of time with me and gotten to know me in all my moods -- and you don't like me? Well, ok. Fair enough. I may even be sorry.
But if you're one of those who judges me harshly based solely on the information you've been given by others? Then you're an idiot. I don't care how much you like said others, how much you trust them -- you're getting biased information, and if you can't see through that, then ... well, I don't know what to tell you. I'd say "idiot," but I know some of you who give me nasty looks at social gatherings are actually quite smart.
I should point out that it's also irrational to like me based solely on my posts here; however, I am not worried much by that. People who like me irrationally don't bug me as much as people who hate me and shoot me scornful and disapproving stares at gatherings of my social circle.
I mention this only because in the last two years or so, a lot of half-assed information composed of about equal parts hyperbole and imagination has gone out to people who are acquainted with me, and it already cost me at least one friendship that I was really beginning to treasure -- despite the fact that the information given to that person was almost entirely untrue. And while some of the blame goes to the dickhead who decided to spread lies and half-truths to all who knew the both of us, a large portion also goes to this man who tossed our friendship aside so easily. And others, who haven't spent more than an hour or two around me, have decided I'm an asshole based solely on things they hear about me, without ever hearing the other side of the story.
That's not "friendship," folks. That's ignorance.
And yeah, I am still angry about it. If you lost a friend because he turned out to care less for you than for the lies of someone he knows damned well to be not entirely trustworthy, you'd be pissed off, too. Besides, it's hard for me to let go, sometimes, ok? It's a flaw. I know.
Edit
The part I forgot to type:
I've been guilty of this too. I'm trying to overcome that, and forget the things I have decided without enough information. It may not make any of those *I* dislike into my friends, but at least it will be for honest evaluations and not split-second decisions.
But if you're one of those who judges me harshly based solely on the information you've been given by others? Then you're an idiot. I don't care how much you like said others, how much you trust them -- you're getting biased information, and if you can't see through that, then ... well, I don't know what to tell you. I'd say "idiot," but I know some of you who give me nasty looks at social gatherings are actually quite smart.
I should point out that it's also irrational to like me based solely on my posts here; however, I am not worried much by that. People who like me irrationally don't bug me as much as people who hate me and shoot me scornful and disapproving stares at gatherings of my social circle.
I mention this only because in the last two years or so, a lot of half-assed information composed of about equal parts hyperbole and imagination has gone out to people who are acquainted with me, and it already cost me at least one friendship that I was really beginning to treasure -- despite the fact that the information given to that person was almost entirely untrue. And while some of the blame goes to the dickhead who decided to spread lies and half-truths to all who knew the both of us, a large portion also goes to this man who tossed our friendship aside so easily. And others, who haven't spent more than an hour or two around me, have decided I'm an asshole based solely on things they hear about me, without ever hearing the other side of the story.
That's not "friendship," folks. That's ignorance.
And yeah, I am still angry about it. If you lost a friend because he turned out to care less for you than for the lies of someone he knows damned well to be not entirely trustworthy, you'd be pissed off, too. Besides, it's hard for me to let go, sometimes, ok? It's a flaw. I know.
Edit
The part I forgot to type:
I've been guilty of this too. I'm trying to overcome that, and forget the things I have decided without enough information. It may not make any of those *I* dislike into my friends, but at least it will be for honest evaluations and not split-second decisions.